Healthy Salad

Grilled Chicken
Lettuce
Cucumbers
Cherry Tomatos
Avocados
Alfalfa sprouts
Spinach
Onions/red onions
Green peppers
Mushrooms
Celery
Fat Free shredded cheese
Fat Free dressing


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Breakfest/Lunch Recipe

Fat Free Cream Cheese
Whole Wheat Bagels
Cucumbers
Alfalfa sprouts

-Toast your bagel

-Cut the Cumcumbers thin about 1 inch.

-Spread the Fat Free Cream Cheese on the Whole Wheat Bagel.

-Place as many as cumcumbers as you want.

-You can also add Alfalfa sprouts.



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Sad & Pethic

It's sad and pethic that someone has to post on their Facebook status that they are looking for friends and what kind of person they are. Not to mention she deleted me from her page. I then blocked her. I don't need someone like that on my friends list or to associate with them.


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So far, so good

I am focusing on things one at a time. A vision of me not wanting to be a fat bride is in my head. I don't want to look like this and regret looking at my wedding pictures and video. I need to do something about my weight now. I don't want to be fat anymore and look and feel like this. I want to start accomplishing my goals that I have set for myself.

I am wonder now I will look by May when my sister comes for my cousins communion party. I want to at least lose 30 pounds by then and I would be 237 lbs by then. I'm not gonna rush it but my main focus is to work on my weak spots and make them into my strenghts.


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Priorities

So far things are going good. I am eating healthy but I am working on my weak parts and that is my working out. I need to make that a priority in my life. I am not eating out or eating fast food. I am sick of the bad foods that I eat in my life. I am changing my life and I am loving it.

2 wedding dreams with face

Last night and a few nights ago I had another wedding dream but these last 2 were I seen the face of the man I was going to marry and that man was my friend Tom. I hope this is my sign from god that he is going to be the man I am gonna have as my husband.


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Hints Part 1

-I caught him staring at me.
-He says he loves me
-He finds ways to touch me.
-Calls me cute names like babe/sugarplum/babycakes

If and if he will confesses his love for me I will tell him that I kept on denying my feelings for you cause you were first my friend and then there was my rule for not dating friends cause I didn't want to screw up our friendship and also my other rule for dating men younger than me.

Then there was that one time you told me you that I wasn't your type but then again you seem to be flirting with me even before and after you went into the seminary.

What I mean by flirting was in the beginning somehow you gave me a kiss on the cheek when you shook my hand in church but that wasn't the only time you have done that. I didnt think anything of it. Then there was that tine when we held hands when we took a walk in your grandfathers neighborhood but that was before you told me I wasn't your type. That was another part I didn't think anything of.

Then there was that one time where you jumped on top of me when I was on bed on the Motor City Hotel.

When you went into the seminary I had put 2 walls up. One was the friendship wall and the second one was the semiary wall but those walls are down and I am complety in love with you. I know I can't have you now and I never will cause you are in the seminary. I will be here if you decide that being a priest isn't for you.

We have known each other for 9 years when I was dating your friend then as time went on we became good friends. Somehow that turned into something more.

What do all these mean. Are they hints for me that you like me. Am I just a fool to believe these are flirtly signs.

I wish you knew what you wanted. I hope I am making the right desision. In my heart I know good things come to those who wait. If I was you and if I was in the semiary I would be taking it seriously and not do the things you do or even talk the way you do.

You have 5 1/2 years left and if you don't make a decision in a couple years by the time I am 33 and you are 30. This will give you enough time to see if you will go through the end. I will move on with my life and find someone new.
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I have to remember all the times he let me down in 2009 by standing me up. It pisses me off when he does this. What real friend does this to a good friend of theirs. I guess he doesn't care.
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Why does he continue to do the same things he always did before he decided to go into the sememiry. Or that he told me that I wasn't his type a couple years ago.

Last night he told me that this year is a lot harder and in April he will determine if he is meant to become a priest. When I heard this it put a smile on my face. I will just have to wait and see what will come of our future if we remain friends or friendship turns into something more.

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Things are looking up

When I went to the dentist on Monday I was talking to Kelly who works there. I've known her for a long time. We always talk when I am there. She asked me about if I had a job and I told her I was still looking. She asked me about school. I told I graduated in July. She gave me the number to a place where either her friend or sister worked. It was a job in my field. I went that day and filled out a application and I was gonna give it a week but to my suprise they called me in for a interview for today at 2:00.

I am hoping and praying I get this job and it's a full time job. Last night Tom called me and asked me if I heard the news about the Masseuchetts Govenor seat. That a republication got it.

I asked him how school was going and he told me it's tough and this would be the semester to determine if he was meant fir the Priesthood. He will know in April. When I head this I put a smile on my face.

Today is my weight in day and I weighted myself and usual with nothing on and no eating or drinking. I used the toliet. I went on the scale and was happy to see that I was 257. I had lost 2 pounds from where I was before at 259.

I went out to eat at County Chief and I was did good. I ordered the baked orange roughy. I got the dinner which included soup,salad,and desert. I ordered cabbage soup, gave the salad and desert to my dad. I skipped the bread basket and crackers. This was the first time I went out to eat in a while. What I have been doing is eating not that much food. I also been trying to workout for 6 days a week.

I am hoping I get thus job cause it would be a start to establish my life and one less thing for me to worry about.

I found out that if I focus on one thing at a time that I was more likely to succeed.


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Wedding Dream

I had anothet wedding dream but this one was of me at my reception hall. I was eating at teh hard table but it  wasn't a regular head table. I wasn't sitting by my husband. I was sitting on the side with my mom and my older sister was where I was supposed to be. Then I told my mom that I should be by my husband. But he wasn't there. I wanted to get something to drink while everyone was having dinner and I looked at the line and I said screw it. My little sister handed me the little pitcher of water. Then later on I went to the bathroom and I look down on my dress and it was a A-line lace. I kissed some guy and he told me Congratulations.

I was looking around the room I noticed that everyone was having a good time. I seen that the hall was not as a banquet hall should be. The dance Floor was on the back. The orchestra band was in front but just during dinner cause they had another party to go to and there was also a DJ. I had RENT-A-DJ there. I never saw the photographer or Videographer there.

Then Toby Maguire was at my wedding. He called me over to where he was sitting and I was talking to him. He wanted me to request a song that was on the 3rd Spiderman movie. Some song about Savannah. Anyways, then we headed to the head table and we were sitting and I was asking him about Spiderman 4. Why wasn't he gonna be in it and here comes Paula Dean coming up to us to talk. Then I woke up.

In all my wedding dreams I  ever had I never saw who I was marrying. I wish I knew. I hope to have a wedding dream when I am planning my wedding and there will be a face to the man that will be my husband.

Made Fit TV

My last blog post I had told you about MadeFit TV. The first time I had heard about Jenny was I was watching my city channel on December 7th, 2008. They had a segment on a local personal trainer. At the time it was Brides Made Fit. I know I wasn't a Bride but she had some really good information on Health and Fitness. I then forgot about the news cast cause I wasn't in the fitness state of mind.

Then when I got back into the swing of things I had remembered that news cast and checked out her I-Pod cast on ITunes. I checked out her website and seen that she did a LIVE cast on USTREAM. So I checked it out on October 13, 2009. It was her Pumpkin Bread episode. From then on I was hooked and I look forward to every Saturday at noon. She has helped me a lot and I continue to tune in to see her live and talk with her before and after every show.



If you need help with weight loss. Tune in to her for free advice.

Quick Update

So I wanted to do a quick update. I have weighted myself today but I know it isn't a weigh in day I am now 259 lbs. I am so happy that I am under 260. My hightest was 263 so I am slowly losing.

A new year - A new lifestyle

Right now my daily routine is very lazy and boring. I get up eat breakfest, go on the computer check my email and surf the net, play games on Pogo, and watching TV. But some of that is changing. My new year goals are to spend less time on the computer and watching TV. That is a start for me to find something that I can do that is more active and not sit on my behind waste away the day.

My new lifestyle will be me being more active. I am slowly incorporting exercise in my daily routine. Learning new healthy habits. The key to this success is to take it one day at a time so that I can focus on each of my goals so that I am more likely to succeed. Success doesn't happen over night so I am looking at it as I will do this throughout the year and even years after this year.

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MadeFit TV: Motivate and Inspire me

I don't make Resolutions anymore I make goals for the year and I am not a diet I am on a health plan. When I refer the words of resolutions and diet. I have always failed and they are only short term. I am in this for the long run. I am always looking for encouraging words to help me in my weight loss process.


Jennifer DiDonato of MadeFitTV.com. Has been a great inspiration to me in my life and through my weight loss journey. She is one of my weight loss tools that will help me not give up. I am looking to her as a mentor that I can learn from and lead me to the weight I want to be

REMEMBER: DIET'S DON'T WORK!!!!

I come first. Love comes second

A part of me has my feelings in a box that wants to open up and let it all out. I will let them out when the time is right to tell Tom my feelings. I can't really tell him how I really feel now cause in order for me to tell him I need his feelings to come out in the open in order for me to have me tell him how I feel.

When and if will that ever happen. I am focused on me now . My career and weightloss comes first.


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2010 Outlook

It's almost New Years Eve and almost time for 2009 to come to an end.

I have a lot to work an in 2010. Since it's a start of a new dedicade I need to start changing my bad habits. I am gonna focus on them one atva time so that I am able to see my problems and work on it.

I am also gonna try to find a full time temporary job so that I am able to establish myself by saving money to buy a car and move out on my own.

Weightloss is also a big focus for me. I am going to try to keep a food log to track my calories. So I don't go over a certain amout. I made a goal to go to the gym twice a week and workout the rest of the week at home. I have to make the anichitive to stick to my workout plan Jenny made for me. And stick to my goals.


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Some time off

I have given some time off from my business thoughts. I am slowly giving those thoughts back in my thinking.

When I get back into thinking about my business I am more confident that I still want this to happen. I am also confident that I will need the help I need to guide me through out my process.

I am still working on my business plan. I want to work on it a long time then I will have a SCORE mentor to look at it and see what I need help with.

I am writing down a checklist of the things I need to take me to see myself opening my business. Also what supplies I need for my business. From the displays I need to the merchindice I need.


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What I want

I thought that what I wanted to move out to California and start a new life there. I wanted that more than anything but now all I want to focus on is my career. I want to establish myself and move out so I can have a life of my own like my sisters.

I also want to lose weight and weigh 120 pounds. I don't want to worry about finding a job and having to lose a large amount of weight.


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Family

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. My sister is coming in tomorrow and then at 5 we are going over my aunts and uncles house for dinner and our traditional Christmas Eve. I am excited to see my family. They are what make me happy and and all free. Without having them in my life I wouldn't know where I would be.


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Thoughts

I have thought about....
what goes into owning a business.
What legal steps I need to take
What I need for my business
What supplies I need
How to hire employees
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If I want something done I have to do it myself. No one believes in me or encourages me in what makes me happy. All my dreams and goals are kept to myself and a few others know about my dreams. No one that doesn't support me or encourage me then they will have no part in my future.

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The Holiday Week

This week is busy week. My older sister is coming into town on Thursday (Christmas Eve) morning then we are heading to my aunt and uncles for dinner. Then on Friday (Christmas) we are having dinner at my house. On Saturday it's my little cousions 1st birthday, also my little sister is going back home to California. Then on Sunday my mom told me my aunt wants to buy us dinner so I will get to see her and my cousin Joann (my aunts daughter). What a great end of a week. This is why I Iove the holiday's. I love spending time with my family during these times. I cherish these times.

Next week is the end of the year and New Years Eve. My friend Tom had called me a few days ago and called to ask what was I doing for New Years Eve. I had told him nothing. He said something about cooking dinner one day either him or I. I didn't know if he was talking about next week for New Years but I wonder what he has up his sleve.

I just wish he knew what he wanted to do. He keeps on doing the same thing before he went into the seminary.

I can picture marrying him and what life would be like living with him under the same roof. I have grown to love him as a friend and now it's more than a friend.
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