Little steps

Today I went for a walk in my neighborhood and took a different route.I took a 23 minute walk. I did feel good afterwards. On the 29th I went for 13 minutes. So I am improving little by little.

I love watching the live broadcast of Madefit TV and after she does her workout she comes on and chats. This is one of my Motivational Tools. She has inspired me to maybe run in the Thanksgiving Day Turkey Trot next year. I have to get ready for this. I am walking first to help me get back to being active and helping me work toward running.


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3 Years

Its been 3 years since I joined blogger. Since then I have done a lot of blogging. A lot has changed and I am a different person I don't have Bloop Diary anymore and so Blogger is my main blog I write in.


Ghost Adventures is tonight at 8:00  for 7 hours. I am excited. I love shows like these.I used to be freaked out but now I love it. It interests me plus looking at a hot eye candy for 7 hours is a treat.

Kiki's Reviews

I have another blog where I write my reviews from the places I have eaten and to other experiences. Also since I love weddings I will have reviewing vendors.

There is a difference between quitting,failing,not trying, and giving up

• It's better to fail at something than not to try at all
• Once if you don't succeed try and try again.

I can't give up on trying to succeed on being able to run a marathon and also being a more active person. I want so many new things to happen in my life I want to run Marathons,learn to swim, learn to cook. But first if I want to get to that point I am starting off slow cause my new motto is you gotta learn to walk before you can run..

I believe things happen for a reason and when I find a job that suits me that it'll be the career that was meant for me.

A starting point

I took a walk today and I felt good after a 13 minute walk around the block. I need a good starting point to where I can devlop a routine everyday that has me doing some kind of cardio. I have to block the negitive thoughts that have me thinking that I don't feel like going for a walk. I have to get up and go and I will feel good about it.

I want to see myself reach my goals. Running marathons,learning to swim. In order for me to reach those I gotta learn to walk before I can run.
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Challenges

Through out my Journey I want to conquer some challenges such as FEAR. I have a fear of the deep of the the pool cause I don't know how to swim. I try but it's not good enough. So I will work up to that where I will be able to swim to the deep end.

I want to run marathons and maybe a Triathlon but I have to work up to that point and I have to work hard if I want to see myself achieve these goals that I am setting for myself. These are new changes I am getting excited about.

Walls are up and ready

Last night I was thinking about the walls I put up. I need these walls to help keep my mind off Tom and help me focus on my future. If he decides that the priesthood isn't for him and wants more than a friendship with me then I won't be in the state of Michigan and I will remember what he told me in the car. He told me I wasn't his type so I put up that wall and will no longer flirt with him or have him flirt with me.


Tomorrow morning I have a interview with Fisher and Company. I am hoping to get this job so that I can start working and have 1 less thing to worry about other than finding a job. I can focus on other things.


When I get this job I will see my future of buying my own car and moving to California clearer. I will be able to save money for a car,buy my own healthy grocery's, and give money to my church.


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Goal Weight Reward (Upgraded)

When I reach 120 lbs and remain that weight for a while I will reward myslef with a Professional Photography Session. I was thinking about a better way for me to do this that has me excited. I wanna do it in California, Renting a Limo and getting a California based photographer and going to a nice park and then Beach and some other places recommend by the photographer. I will also buy all new outfits along with a bikini. I will also be getting my hair and make up done by a professional. If I do this I will be paying for it and I will definitely deserve it. This is  a way to help motivated me and help me get more focused on my weight loss.

I Want!!!

All I want right now is to get a full time job, start working, save money to buy a car, buy a car, then start saving to move out.

I want to find my career so that I can start living my life.

I want to lose all this weight and be able to weigh 120 lbs. I don't want to worry about this and finding my career but all I can do now is pray, look for a job, start working and saving money.
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Changes come with Mistakes

So far my changes are doing good. I am taking it day by day and I hope these changes stick. I am feeling good and I need to keep that in mind for me to keep me motivated and keep these changes stick.

What is also helping me is writing down my feelings in this blog and my blog in Sparkpeople. I need to express my feelings to help me know what helps me to keep going. If I don't then I'll be unmotivated and lose my motivation and lose focus.

So I do want to lose weight but my main goal is to get fit and healthy.

I did eat Taco Bell but I did cardio today along with my upperbody. It's gonna take time for me to complety eat heathy but I know I'll get to that point one day it'll take time and a lot of mistakes that I'll learn along the way.
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Making changes stick

If I want to make changes in my life I will focus on that one change and making sure that I do that change everyday. If i don't then I will then try and try again until I do that change and making sure that it will stick.

One change I am doing is not eating animals. I still eat some but it's gonna take a while for me not to eat any. Also I can't eat cheese anymore cause it's to salty for me to eat which is good cause once I eliminate that from what I eat I will see some major weight loss. My taste buds are slowly changing and it's a good thing. I will see food in a different way like fast food doen't appeal to me anymore and the good and healthy foods look good.

It's up to me

No one can make me lose the weight but me. I am the only one that can make the change I want to see.

L.B.D (Little Black Dress)

If I want to buy a L.B.D  (Little Black Dress) I need to take action and in order for me to run a 5K race I need to wake up and start walking before I start running to build up my stamina.

Billy Ashley’s Twice-Baked Potatoes

Ingredients: (makes 2 potatoes)
- 2 large size baking potatoes
- 1 onion (I prefer yellow onions)
- Philadelphia Onion & Chive Cream Cheese (8 oz tub)
- A few tablespoons of half & half
-Stick of butter
- 4-6 slices of bacon
- Salt/Pepper   
* For a lower fat version, substitute olive oil for bacon grease and skim or lower fat milk for half & half

Directions:

• Preheat oven to 450 degrees
• Wrap potatoes in tin foil.
• Put potatoes in oven for approximately an hour until the potatoes are just about done. To test this, stick a fork in the potato and if you can get the fork all the way in easily, that’s where you want them.
• Unwrap the potatoes from the tinfoil. Keeping the oven at 450 degrees, put the potatoes back in oven and keep an eye on them until the skin is crispy/crunchy. To test this, poke the potato with your finger and if the skin feels crispy, it’s done.
• Take the potatoes out of the oven and cut them open down the middle so you can scoop out the filling. Keep potato skins on a plate nearby.
• Scoop out the both potatoes’ filling with a large spoon and put in a large bowl. Mix a “splash” of half and half (more or less depending on what texture you like), tub of cream cheese and a pinch of salt and pepper until potatoes are a creamy, mashed-potato-like texture.
• Put filling back into potato skins and set them to the side to cool a bit. Now it’s time to make the bacon and onions!
• Fry bacon in a large pan and leave the bacon grease to fry the onions in. Once bacon cools, crush them into bacon bits and set aside.
• Dice onion and caramelize in bacon grease so the onions are golden brown with a crispy texture. You can use a strainer or paper towel to get rid of some of the bacon grease from the onions.  Set onions aside to use right before serving.
• Sprinkle bacon bits on top of potatoes.
• Cube butter into quarter inch squares and stick 2 cubes into potatoes (while doing so you might push the bacon bits into the potato, which is intentional).
• Put the potatoes back into the oven at 450 degrees (or at broil if you need them done more quickly.)  At this point, be sure to keep an eye on the potatoes, so they don’t burn! When the top of the potato filling starts to brown on top, take them out.
• Let the potatoes cool for a few minutes then put a tablespoon or so of the caramelized onions on top right before serving.

Gotta learn to Walk before you can Run

My new motto is Gotta learn to Walk before you can Run. In order for me to run a 5K or a Marathon I gotta build up my stamina so that I am able to start running. So as a beginner I am walking for a short distance so that I am able to  get used to walking and lose some weight before I can really build enough stamina to start running. I have to make sure I am consistent and I walk everyday the same route I walked today.

Today I needed to clear my head so I put on my workout clothes and went for a walk and when I got home I felt great. I gotta start somewhere and tomorrow I am hoping that I will be able to get up and go for a walk but I am going with Jenny for a photo session of her. It's for fun and one of my hobbies.

What is helping me

So far I am trying to focus on becoming a Vegertaian. Also writing in my blog and writing in my journal is helping me focus to be in the health/fitness state of mind.

Since I don't cook that much and want to cook more I am researching how I can cook healthy foods for a week. I am putting together things that will help me with my weight loss such as weight loss tools.

These small steps will become big changes in my life and now if only I can make them stick and keep my focus then I'll be in business.


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Dear Christina

Since you first came out with Genie in a bottle I instantly become a fan of yours. I have all your CD’s and went to all of your concerts except for one. You are the only one I will see in concert. The reason I am writing you this letter is because you are such a huge inspiration to me. You have a voice of an angel and you put on one hell of a concert.

No matter how many times you transform yourself you will always be beautiful.

Your CD Striped had helped me a lot. I had went through a break up and that CD helped put me in a place to where I could have the motivation to move on. Every time someone tells me I can’t do something I put on your Stripped CD and listen to Soar and also Keep Singing  my Song. For me those two songs mean a lot to me. They get me through the tough times.

#2: My own business - Maid Service Owner

I have been thinking about it and I am not interested anymore. It was a idea and now that my heart doesn't want to do it anymore. What my career will be I am still thinking about it.

Personal Trainer

I had gotten unmotivated to working out and so then recently I was watching the Biggest Loser was thinking about if a Personal Trainer would help me and would I be committed to working out with one. I don't really commit to anything for a long period of time. I remembered a podcast called Brides Made Fit. and I went to it and started watching and that made me motivated to wot king out again..

When it all comes down to it

When it all comes down to it about me thinking about owning my own business it's all ideas. I really want to move out to California. When ever I am thinking about what my life would be like if I were to move and live the California lifestyle. Yes I know it's expensive to live there but once I get a job I will be able to save money to move to move out there.


I need a new start in my life and moving to California is what I want. I am happy when I am there to visit. There is so much to see and do and so many new experiences for me to experience.


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Vaniqa - Prescription cream clinically proven to reduce unwanted facial hair

Vegetarian Starter Kit

I actually got a Vegetarian Starter Kit from Peta in the mail today. I am gonna try it and see how it goes. I did it before but only for a day.

What is stopping me?

I have gone to a whole time low. I am not caring no matte how hard I want to be in the fitness mind. I just can't do it anymore. Maybe I am giving up but trying so hard to get back on the wagon.

Scattered Brained/Confused/Can't think straight

My thoughts are so scattered. I can't think straight. It's driving me insane. I have to figure out a way to get my thoughts in order and figure out what I want and what I want to do.

Here is what I am working with:

• Getting a job.
• Thinking about my future. if I want to own my own business.
• Thinking about what I need to do to get things started.
• If I own my own business I would have to stay here in Michigan.
• I still want to move out to California.
  

My Plan

I know what I have to do to make things happen.

1. Get a job: Being able to buy my own healthy groceries.
2. Cooking at home: Not going out to eat everyday.
3. Hiring a Personal Trainer:
   

#1: My own business - Bridal Boutique Owner

I love weddings and have gone to many weddings. I may want to open my own Bridal Boutique. My cousin Janae's friend owned one but she sold hers and then that business went out of business. If I open one I  want my business to be different. It's not only gonna be a bridal boutique where you can buy accessories but check out reviews on Vendors. It's gonna be a all in one shop. Vendors can come and promote their business to brides to be but they will have to pay a fee. Brides can see and wriete their own reviews on vendors. I will also get the chance to work with these vendors. The closest business I have seen to this is The Bridal Bar that is located in California and Atlanta I have costumer service and know how to deal with them But first I need to see if anyone is hiring so that I can get some experience in the bridal field.

Jennifer DiDonato and Made Fit TV

I  am pointing out all my problems in my weight loss struggle. I am doing this cause I have come to a point in my life where things need to start happening and changing. This is making me aware of my problems and I need to figure out a way to solve and fix these in my life. I am choosing bad choices and not focusing on what really matters 

I love watching the Biggest Loser to help make me see things I can't see and also to help motivate me. I have found out I have a local motivator that it helping me get back into the fitness state of mind. Her name is Jennifer DiDonato. She is from Sterling Heights. The first time I heard about her is when I was watching the Sterling Heights News. It's a local news show here where I live. I saw a segment about her and her company called Brides Made Fit. Even though I wasn't a Bride to be. I went to check it out and there was a lot of helpful information on fitness. Then I got distracted and forgot about it until I recently wanted to be in the fitness mind set again, so I remembered that she had a blog and now I am hooked and gonna be tuning in every Saturday at noon for her live podcast. She talks about various fitness stuff
and some recipes. She also has Made Fit which is for everyone. You should check it out at http://www.madefittv.com 

Going Green: Saving Money and the Planet

There are few things that I am doing to save Money and the Planet. I keep the lights off as much as possible. Such as during the day when I go to the bathroom I keep the lights off. Also when I am taking a shower I keep the lights off. I am used to taking a shower in the dark. I sometimes will have candles but mostly it's in the dark. I prefer it this way. I also keep all the lights off in the house.The only thing is on is either the computer or the TV.

Baby Dream

I had a dream last night that I had a baby girl. She was the cutest thing . I named her Jordan, The crazy thing is that I seen my ex in my dream I was thinking that he might of been the father.


Here is what drammoods.com says: To see a baby in your dream, signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings.  Babies symbolize something in your own inner nature that is pure, vulnerable, helpless and/or uncorrupted.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Then another part of the dream was I was breastfeeding her.


Here is what drammoods.com says:Breastfeeding- To dream that you are breast feeding, symbolizes tenderness, love, nurturance, and motherly love. Good things will be at your grasp. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you need to be careful in who you confide in.

Nursing -  To see someone nursing or dream that you are nursing, suggests that you are nurturing a hidden aspect of yourself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 I hope this is a sign from God that I do have a new beginning in my life. I pray ever night that I am able to star seeing my new life take place.

Testing new iPhone application

This is totally cool. I am blogging from my iPhone in my room. This is cool.

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Brownies

1 cup of butter
2 cups of sugar
¾ cups of Cocoa
½ cup for dusting
4 eggs
1 tsp of Vanilla extract
1 ¼ cup flour
1/c tsp of salt

Rub a tiny bit of water on the inside of a jelly-roll pan (10x14), then line it with the wax paper. The water will help the  wax paper adhere to the pan. Butter the pan and Preheat oven to 340 Degrees

Melt butter. In a mixing bowl stir ¾ cup of cocoa and the sugar together , stir in melted butter. Add eggs and Vanilla and stir again. Add flour, salt and mix until smooth.

Spread the mixture evenly in the pan. Bake at 340 degrees for about 30-35 minutes or until brownies  pull away from the sides of the pan. Let cool before cutting.
 
Put the ½ cup of cocoa power in a bowl and dip the top of the brownies in it.

Chocolate Molten Cakes

4 squares BAKER'S Semi-Sweet Baking Chocolate
1/2 cup (1 stick) butter
1 cup powdered sugar
2 eggs
2 egg yolks
6 Tbsp. flour
1/2 cup thawed COOL WHIP Whipped Topping

PREHEAT oven to 425°F. Butter four 3/4-cup custard cups or soufflé dishes. Place on baking sheet.

MICROWAVE chocolate and butter in large microwaveable bowl on HIGH 1 min. or until butter is melted. Stir with wire whisk until chocolate is completely melted. Stir in sugar until well blended. Blend in eggs and egg yolks with wire whisk. Stir in flour. Divide batter among prepared custard cups.

BAKE 13 to 14 min. or until sides are firm but centers are soft. Let stand 1 min. Carefully run small knife around cakes to loosen. Invert cakes onto dessert dishes. Serve immediately, topped with whipped topping.

Seven Layer Dip

Layer in 9x12 glass dish
Layer 1 – 2 cans Refried beans (or 1 32oz)
Layer 2 – 3 mashed avocados, 2T lemon juice, S&P to taste (or 2 things of guac)
Layer 3 – 1 c sour cream, ½ c mayo, ½ pkg Taco Mix > mixed well
Layer 4 – 1 bunch green onions, chopped
Layer 5 - 3 tomatoes, chopped
Layer 6 - 1 can of black olives, chopped  (or trader joe's salsa from the fridge section, drained in place of 4-6)
Layer 7 – 8 oz shredded cheddar cheese

Serve with taco chips.

Cheesy Potatoes

- 1 Bag Frozen Hashbrowns
- Chopped Onion (to your liking - sometimes I use the frozen ones, maybe about a cup)
- 1 stick melted butter
- 1 can Cream of Chicken soup
- 8 oz Sour Cream
- A bag of shredded cheddar cheese (the recipe calls for I think 2 cups but I always throw in way more)
- salt and pepper to taste
- Crushed potato chips or corn flakes

Mix everything together except corn flakes/potato chips in a 9x13 pan. Cover with the crushed potato chips/corn flakes and cook for about an 45 minutes to an hour at 350 degrees.

TACO BAKE

1 lb. ground round
1 package taco seasoning
15 oz. can tomato sauce
8 oz. seashell pasta
8 oz package cream cheese (softened in microwave)
1/2 c. sour cream
8 oz. shredded sharp cheddar cheese

Brown ground beef, drain. Add taco seasoning and tomato sauce. Bring to a boil and then simmer for 20 minutes.

In the meantime, cook pasta according to directions. Drain. Mix softened cream cheese and sour cream in separate bowl.

Spray bottom of 9 x 13 pan with Pam. Put pasta in bottom of pan. Spread cream cheese mixture over pasta. (This is kind of hard to do. Just dollop spoonfuls of the mixture about an inch apart and spread the best you can.) Spoon ground beef mixture over this. Sprinkle shredded cheese on top.

Bake @ 350 for 30 minutes. Cool about 15 - 20 minutes before serving.

Alcoholic Beverages to try

Moet & Chandon Champagne
Patrón Tequila
Sparkling Nuvo
Cîroc Vodka
Chocovine Chocolate Wine - Europa Choco Vine
Tequilla Rose

Day Five 14 Day Diet and Cleanse

Today was a better day. I didn't do all that bad.  I didn't write in my food log or exericse. I feel like I am slipping but I need to keep focus until I am doing a routine of keeping a food log and exercising.

Day Four: 14 Day Diet and Cleanse

Today was not a very good day. I didn't eat good and I did take my daily pills. I am gonna have more of these days I am sure of it but I have to keep going cause tomorrow is a new day to kick myself back up again.

Opening my eyes more: No more KFC

A few years ago when I saw the PETA videos I wanted to become a vegetarian I tried it for a few days and I couldn't do it. There is a lot of animals I don't eat such as deer,rabbit,duck. Recently not it's beef. After watching a video that Pamela Anderson was explaining how KFC treats the chickens it opened my eyes more than ever. If you ever want to see a video on the PETA website I will warn you now it's very hard to watch if you have a heart for animals like I do. Watching some of those videos have made me more aware of the foods I eat such as KFC. I can't eat taco Bell cause it does numbers to my stomach.. Then a few days ago I was watching The Dr.'s and they hasd a seqment about how much fat there is in a hamburger and I will not eat a fast food hamburger anymore. I need to keep my eyes more open so that I can keep with this and this isn't a one day fad for me that I get interested and lose interest the next day. I will also not eat bacon anymore. I'm working on not eating pork anymore cause I am picturing the cute little piglet being butchered.

Another Problem that needs to be solved.

I am not a cook and don't cook on a regular basics. I'm having a hard time thinking of healthy meals to prepare. I do go grocery shopping every once and a while but all I mostly get is Whole Wheat Bread,Skinless chicken,etc... I can't think of options on how to prepare good healthy meals. I am also looking for healthy breakfast meals. I am sick of making myself egg sandwiches and eating cereal.


I want to be able to make healthy meals and set aside portions through out my day. I seen The Biggest Loser say that it will help you lose the weight.